Dear Answer Mom: My son and daughter-in-law recently had an adorable baby boy. Before he was born they said they would name him after my husband who died two years ago. When he was born my daughter-in-law said she loved a different name and gave that name to the baby. They don’t plan to have any other children so this is my only grandchild. I feel that this was a promise and I’m upset. I would like to at least add a middle name for my husband. Our religion has a special naming ceremony and I would like to do this there but my daughter-in-law is of a different religion so how do I handle this?—Emma
Dear Emma: With great care. Talk to your son first and make it clear to him casino spiele that you love the baby and your daughter-in-law and you don’t want to upset anyone but this is important to you. If your son doesn’t wish to go further then drop it. One day you can tell your grandson about his grandfather and include your husband in talking about family history. Give priority to being a part of your grandson’s life and experiencing the pleasure this will bring by whatever name.
Dear Answer Mom: My daughter is getting married soon. Good friends and relatives made her a tasteful lovely bridal shower. Now, though, her colleagues at work are planning to surprise her by taking her to a “bachelorette” party at a male strip club or male stripper dancers whatever they’re called. I took a message for my daughter when she wasn’t home and that person told me about it in secret. I’m sure my daughter will not appreciate this tacky kind of entertainment but I don’t know if I should warn her about it because it’s supposed to be a surprise.–Not Sure
Dear Not Sure: Tacky to you – titillating to others- maybe. Say nothing. Your daughter will survive it even if she finds it offensive. What she won’t survive as well is the embarrassment of having her mother interfere. These are people she works with and she won’t want to insult them or have to put on an act if she knows about it. It’s one evening. They care about her and it’s their version of fun. Stay mum, mom!!
Problems? Ask THE ANSWER MOM. Email Helen Oxenberg, MSW, at Helen@mothering21.com